Photos That Make the Rude Pundit Wonder if Parents Can Be Aborted:


Oh, sweet little Allan Taylor of Silver Springs, Nevada. One or both of your parents have fed you a bundle of lies as surely as they have fed you a steady diet of frozen, lard-filled chicken nuggets and high fructose corn syrup-infused Sam's Choice cola. The 8 year-old in the yellow hoodie and running pants of elastic comfort holds a sign that reads "HANDS OFF MY MONEY OBAMA" in his little hands. And the inevitable question ought to be "What the fuck's a 'Money Obama'"?

However, other than the rules of punctuation, someone ought to explain a simple thing to Allan and his teabagger Mom and/or Dad who dragged the child to a Sharron Angle rally: money that you pay in taxes ain't your fucking money. Oh, sure, it's a good line, the kind of delicious hairy sack that Angle devours constantly. The Nevada Republican candidate for Senate did it last night at her "debate" (if by "debate," you mean, "Inarticulate tortoise fight") with Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid. Discussing the Bush tax cuts, Angle said, "First of all, let's really talk about whose money that is. It's not the federal government's money, it's our money. And when he says we're squandering the federal money, the federal government's money, it's really squandering our money."

Listen, Allan: your parents are fucking idiots who probably shouldn't have bred in the first place, but since your scuzzy dad put his diseased cock into your imbecile mom's kooz and knocked her up, you may as well learn a thing or two. Angle seems to believe that taxes are an investment in the government and that, like if you put money into stocks or gold, you can take that money out and have the money again. That's not the way it works. Taxes are actually fees the government collects so that you can have nice things like Interstate 80, just north of you, which one day you'll hop on while telling your parents to kiss your ass. Once you pay 'em, it's not your money anymore. If you don't like how it's spent or how much is collected, well, that's what elections like this are for. But no matter how low taxes are, it ain't your money. (And if your sign means that you think Barack Obama is taking cash from your future, well, you should ask your parents where your money is gonna come from if taxes don't go up.)

A couple of other quick notes on the suicidally dull Reid/Angle debate:
1. Sharron Angle called herself "a teacher for 25 years." This is not true. Her own website bio states that she was a "substitute teacher" for those 25 years. Now, you can argue about the varying quality of subs, but one thing is clear: they sure as shit ain't teachers by any stretch of the imagination (lesson plans, anyone?). Angle didn't have the credentials to become a full-time teacher. Oh, she did teach "grades K-12 in a one-room Christian school of 24 students for two years." But, while Little House on the Prairie cosplay is charming, that ain't what she said.

2. What the fuck's with the Tea Party women's fixation on men acting manly? Angle told Reid to "Man up" about Social Security. Sarah Palin attacked Barack Obama's balls. Christine O'Donnell implies her male opponents are gay. Honestly, they all sound like they're just begging for a rough fucking.

3. Along those lines, Angle was a total cunt when she attacked Reid for his wealth. Isn't Reid's life story kind of the mythical American Dream in action? A miner dad and a mom who washed john jizz from the clothes of whores so their son could go to college, become a lawyer, earn a shitload of money, and devote the remainder of his life to public service?

Hell, young Allan Taylor, you'd be one lucky son of a bitch if your parents did that for you instead of making you think the big evil guvmint is gonna take your piggy bank.

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